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» www.chirpthird.com » SSOA and friends » SSOA: "Back Porch" » How to get out of a speeding ticket....

   
Author Topic: How to get out of a speeding ticket....
Krista
1st Gear
Member # 1904

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An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

--------------------
Krista
SSOA Member # M02-4294 SLP Member #10414

02 Camaro SS LE Convertible - SScarlt - SLP build # 4294 LE # 1863
SLP goodies: 345 HP CME Performance Pkg, BFG 17" tires, Bilstein Ultra Performance Suspension System & Auburn High Torque Performance Differential, ASR, 12 disc CD, K&N Air Filter, SLP sticker, dash plaque, SLP LE grille, Mobile 1 cap, Passenger Window Express Down Mod, Camaro valve stem caps, SLP Sway Bar, Don Goetz SFC's

16 coats of Zaino (I've got a long way to go...)

Posts: 132 | From: AZ | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
HotWheelSS aka HTWLSS
SSOA Director
Member # 117

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Posts: 7198 | From: Near Portland, Oregon, USA | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
ss_rs_z
4th Gear
Member # 1888

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ROFLMBO...................That is certainly the way to go..........LOL. [Big Grin] [Smile] [Cool] [Razz] [Wink]
Posts: 2841 | From: Westland, MI | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
SSGus
1st Gear
Member # 1897

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Thats Great!
Mind if I put it on my web-site?
[Big Grin]

--------------------
2002 "SS" Red Coupe
SLP #2863
SLP Air Lid
Holley Power Shot Air Filter!
MagnaFlow Exhaust with 3 1/2" Tips
"SLP Y-Pipe"
Home-Page Http://www.gusvette.com

Posts: 55 | From: PC,Florida | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Big A
1st Gear
Member # 1761

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Thats Great [Big Grin]
Posts: 232 | From: Springfield, PA | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
67&02
2nd Gear
Member # 1570

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....  - ....
Posts: 343 | From: Castle Rock, CO | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
BadRag
2nd Gear
Member # 1566

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Good one.. [Big Grin]

BadRag

Posts: 468 | From: Ventura,Ca. | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
helloween
1st Gear
Member # 1506

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[Big Grin] [Smile]

--------------------
SPEED FREAKS
ANONYMOUS

http://community.webshots.com/user/helloween96

Posts: 232 | From: Houston,TX | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged
2002Z4CSS
"Post"er Child
Member # 1393

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That is great! [Big Grin]
Posts: 5682 | From: Dearborn,Mi. | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged
poSSum
AutoXer
Member # 119

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[Big Grin]
Posts: 4222 | From: Winnipeg MB CA | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
Krista
1st Gear
Member # 1904

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Feel free to disseminate the info as you see fit. [Big Grin]
Posts: 132 | From: AZ | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
NATESS
3rd Gear
Member # 982

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that is too funny. [Big Grin]
Posts: 1579 | From: Portland, OR. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
02SS1LE
1st Gear
Member # 2085

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That was crazy ! Thanks for sharing. [Big Grin]
Posts: 39 | From: Virginia | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged
SSGus
1st Gear
Member # 1897

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quote:
Originally posted by Krista:
Feel free to disseminate the info as you see fit. [Big Grin]

OK I did
http://www.gusvette.com/Speeding.htm
if you wish to view it [Wink]
Thanks,
Gus

--------------------
2002 "SS" Red Coupe
SLP #2863
SLP Air Lid
Holley Power Shot Air Filter!
MagnaFlow Exhaust with 3 1/2" Tips
"SLP Y-Pipe"
Home-Page Http://www.gusvette.com

Posts: 55 | From: PC,Florida | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
   

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