posted
An older lady gets pulled over for speeding... Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half! drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
-------------------- SLP OEM air-lid (painted) with Donaldson filter and CAI, GMMG Chambered exhaust,GMS 200 MPH white gauges,3.73 Rear Axle, SS grille with silver logo, 5-Spoke ZR-1 Chrome Plated Wheels, SS Front Floor Mats, Commemorative Portfolio, Custom FRC's, D Goetz signature series SFC's and STB, Gentex Mirror, Power antenna,T/A shifter handle,clear corners, 160 Therm., HPP3 and Silver SS emblems with 345 hp decals painted calipers with Camaro decal car # 10252 41U Onyx Black -1 of 174 A4 verts
-------------------- Kevin Kolvenbach, 2002 Sunset Orange SS (#3455), Convertible, Black top, Ebony leather, Bilstein, ASR, 6SP w/Hurst, 345HP Dual-Dual Posts: 1046 | From: Pine Bush, NY USA | Registered: Aug 2001
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posted
back when I was a police officer, i remember this one lady i caught speeding. I caught her runnin about 20mph over the posted. I walked up to her vehicle, got her license and reg. I walked back to my car, proceeded to write her a citation. When I walked back up to her vehicle with ticket in hand. I went over the citation for speeding with the lady, she signed without hesitation. When i gave her copy to her, she said, "Officer, May i ask you a question?". I said, "Sure"... She said, "How long have you been sitting there running radar?" I told her about 15 min. She stated, "Sorry you had to wait so long, I got here as quick as I could".. I laughed, took her copy of the citation back to my car and wrote her a warning. I was having a bad day but that turned it around!
posted
A similar story from the local police. A guy was stopped for speeding, going way over the speed limit. The police officer asked the driver if he thought he was a jet pilot when he was going so fast. The driver replied that he was a jet pilot, and proceeded to show the officer his pilot's license. They both had a good laugh, and the officer let the driver off with a warning. Posts: 2359 | From: Waterloo, Ontario, Canada | Registered: Jul 2001
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westell
Hey, could someone hand me a fire extinguisher?
Member # 2034
posted
higway patrol finally gets this guy to pull over after chasing him for over 10 miles.
patrolman asks the guy, "Didn't you see my lights and hear my siren?", driver answers, "Yes I did."
patrolman further asks, "Then, why didn't you pull over immediately?
driver answers, "Well, last week my wife ran off with a State Trooper, and, well, I thought you were bringing her back!"
Posts: 161 | From: Houston, Texas | Registered: Aug 2003
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