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Well, 2003 was an exciting year for the H’s. Ok, you’re right, that’s how all those other boring Christmas letters start. We promise no more of such nonsense in this letter.

Son 2 turned 2 sometime in August. We forget which day. He finally has some hair. His Dad does not. He keeps us very busy with his dogged determination to destroy our house and dismantle its entire contents. We had a flood again this year, but this time it was on the second floor (kids and toilets, you know). Son 2 doesn’t say very much, but he is very mechanically smart. We intend to buy him his first welder for Christmas.

Son 1 got his driver’s license in July. He killed three vehicles in his first ten days. Fortunately vehicle number four is still running. He received an all conference nomination in football for offense. We’re not sure whom he offended, but apparently he did a good job. Son 1 is in his senior year of basketball. We are using a really long stick and a hunk of meat to train him to jump higher. We suspect he has a girlfriend because he smells much better lately.

Mom continues to manage the adult DVD section at Northern Rays and videos. She also works part time at the high school as an armed hall monitor. She has been working out regularly at Curves. Last week she found one.

Dad is in his tenth year at the same company. They say he’s the best janitor they’ve ever had. In October he bought a 1951 Chevrolet Fire truck. He is now looking for an ambulance and a Zamboni to complete his collection. Dad did a lot of fishing this year. He is still recovering from a Sturgeon bite on his neck which causes him much embarrassment.

Son 2 and dad finally learned how to hit something with their shot guns this fall. Mom has had a chance to try out some of her goose recipes, but we’ve all spent a lot of time patching the holes in the decoys. We’ve had fun travelling in our hotrod this summer. We’ve met some very nice highway patrol officers.

Our big tomcat, Duper, got the big break in his acting career this year. He will be featured in a Cat’s Eye Lager Beer commercial, schedule to begin airing on Family Channel in January. Our other cat, Beatrice, is Jewish and refuses to participate in any family Christmas activities. Our brown rabbit died. For ten bucks we got a gray and white one.

That should be about it for 2003. See, we weren’t lying about the letter.

Merry Christmas and best wishes for a smashing 2004!


The H’s

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Originally posted by NATESS:
now that was a funny letter. very intertaining.

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Originally posted by poSSum:
Son 2 turned 2 sometime in August. We forget which day. He finally has some hair. He keeps us very busy with his dogged determination to destroy our house and dismantle its entire contents. We had a flood again this year, but this time it was on the second floor (kids and toilets, you know). Son 2 doesn’t say very much, but he is very mechanically smart. We intend to buy him his first welder for Christmas.

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