quote:DEAR ABBY: My 13-year-old daughter, "Rose," has had a boyfriend, "Jason," for nearly a year. He is 12. I just found out they've been having sex, and I'm putting Rose on birth control. Jason never spends much quality time with her. I try to tell her that he is young and not ready for a serious relationship, but she doesn't hear it. My heart aches when I hear Rose crying on the phone because they're arguing.
Rose revolves her life around Jason. She doesn't want to do anything with me or her friends anymore. Her attitude has changed tremendously, and she is losing interest in school. I have asked Rose to sign up for some kind of activity. She refuses. I don't know what to do. Please help. -- WORRIED MOM IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR MOM: It's time to assert yourself. Rose and Jason are both too young to be having sex or even an exclusive relationship. It is up to you to help your daughter understand that as much as she might wish it, Jason is unable to give her the attention and commitment she's craving. You didn't mention if there is a father in your daughter's life. If there isn't, perhaps another adult male in the family can help.
Family counseling for you and Rose could be helpful. It will help to reopen the avenue of communication between you. Her priorities are seriously out of whack, and you are not reaching her. At this age, she should be developing social and intellectual skills.
Personally, I think the response should have been: "Dear Mom, you are obviously too brain-dead to care for a child. Please contact social services in Pennsylvania and make arrangements for them to put your child in a better home. After that, please take steps to make sure that you can never reproduce again."
Posts: 1907 | From: I hope I'm not repeating myself. Again. And Again. Stop picking on me! Waaahhh!! | Registered: Feb 2000
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